hes not military. He went through a lot of bad shit as a kid. His mom had him a month after her 15th birthday and was a meth addict shortly after that. So her life was crazy and they did a lot of running. He witnessed a lot of violence like when she was pregnant with his younger brother the father beat the shit out of her, tried to drown her and pulled a gun on both her and him and told them he was going to murder them. He had to run barefooted to the police station to get help and he was only 5. He stayed with a lot of random people and was abused by them on top of it. hes seen and been through a lot.

I dont cause no one cares :’D haha.

for digital art I use paint tool sai cause I cant get photoshop cause I cant find a key.

for traditional drawings I just use a micron pen

I dont think much of them, its their choice. 

But personally I plan on and do vaccinate with the routine stuff. I think the things like tetanus, mmr, and the usual scheduled vaccines are good. Especially tetanus. I dont think there is enough solid evidence saying it has any negative side affects besides like… temporary redness. For me its the right choice.

However I dont really believe in vaccines for flu or chicken pox. I got the whooping cough vaccine when I was pregnant only because I wanted to pass on that to my son in the womb and because there was an epidemic in my state at the time. I think its better to build immunity to the flu naturally and to simply get the chickenpox as a kid.

But the moms who claim that vaccines cause autism kind of piss me off. Its unfounded and not cool. 

I get what you are saying. I prefer that side of gothic stuff myself. But its all goth. Goth is more a thing and gothic is used to describe something goth lol. And post punk 80s is where the goth thing started so you have to give it some credit. Especially for the older goths they tend to hold tight to it. There are a million kinds of goth though, trad goth, romantigoth, club goth, victorian goth, cyber goth, death rocker, gothic lolita/aristocrat, rivithead, gothabilly..the list goes on. 

Each one has their own idea of what goth is to them. And imo goth is a personal thing. The one thing they all have in common though (80s group included) is a love for the dark. Saying that they are less goth because they are not as gothy (subjective) as some of the other sub generes.. is kind of in itself… a little elitist. 

Its all goth! So lets all get along, quit judging and enjoy ourselves :D 

Absolutely!

HEY LAMBY’S FRIEND LOOK AT THIS PLEASE

they werent super rude so at least there is that. I get it I guess.. lots of people lie about weird shit for attention online. But I can prove it and both my parents talk about it publicly..my dad even posted pictures from the hospital when he had his heartattack. its the only reason I believe him..

thanks. I have to be. If you dont it just weighs on you and I cant be like that I have a kid. Im not particularly good at talking about things in person or expressing my emotion so talking about my issues on tumblr where no one I know IRL (with the exception of like..2 people) is here and I dont have to worry about what they think.

but seriously thank you :) its really nice of you to say this.

I guess its way too personal. Its all true assuming you are talking about my parents. Check out my fb.. its public, who my parents are is marked and look at their fb’s they are pretty open about what they are going through…Im not lying I just dont have anyone to really talk to and talking about it on here makes me feel better.

but thanks.. thanks for that.. really kind of you..

What? The intent was not to sound cool. Im only 23 (born in 89) so yeah I was born just as it was starting. I dont like the “grunge” blogs they are tacky in my opinion (just as we all have things we dont like) and are not grunge. Call it whatever you please but it isnt grunge. I dont want to say “I like grunge” and have people think that Im part of that fad. I may have not been born at the right time but all of the things I have learned about grunge, the legit thing, I have learned through music, cd inserts, videos, books, journals..some of it I even learned through people I know. Like people ive met who hung out with kurt cobain back in oly when he played in the garage/gallery, or were friends with alice in chains members before they were anything, or when we were in a band and a drummer for TAD wanted to steal jon to play with him and we chatted at our house while he fixed our lights and chatted at the place where we both had practice. 

Its not that im super opinionated. Im as opinionated as anyone else out there, you included. Its something that is simply close to my heart and I enjoy and have spent time learning lots about and have been really into. What I stated about what it is, is merely a fact. Nothing opinionated about that.

No I didnt change my mind..I just kind of had to..

I was in labor for nearly two days before going to the hospital. I had been on bed rest for I think one or two days and had handled the contractions just fine. But when I got to the hospital and did the initial blood pressure test and fetal monitoring it was pretty clear that my blood pressure was way too damn high and the baby was also in pretty serious stress for some reason. And also when a baby is in distress it often poops in the womb and that can be an issue so  it has to come out fast.

I was told I needed an epidural to firstly get my blood pressure down because pain causes an elevation in blood pressure so it would help there, and to speed up my dialation. I had my water broken to help speed things up to. Indeed judah had pooped in the sack so it was all for good reason. Pretty immediately I got to a ten and was ready to push. Once I got to a ten the took off the epi so I  could feel the contractions and push naturally.

It was just something we had to do for the safety of my baby :/ Getting the epidural was oddly the worst part of labor. Getting it was painful, it made me puke, it took forever to get done because I was having back to back contractions and they couldnt do it while I was having a contraction. It was miserable getting it. Once it kicked in it was fine obviously but it suuuucked. Also I had bad bad back pain for a few months afterwards.

If I were to have another pregnancy I would probably go water birth and stay away from the hospital…all of the IVs and catheters and the epi..it was all shitty.

thank you very much!